


Life's Innocent Guilt

by MyTaeBae



Category: Bangtan
Genre: Age Difference, Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, Bottom Kim Taehyung | V, Cop/Detective Jungkook, Crime, Crime Scenes, Crimes & Criminals, Depression, Emotional Manipulation, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Forbidden Love, Framed for murder, Grief/Mourning, Hurt Kim Taehyung | V, I don't know anything about police so bare with me, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Innocent or Guilty, Jeon Jungkook is a Little Shit, Loss of Trust, M/M, Minor Character Deaths, Multi, Police, Police Station, Social Anxiety, Taehyung is hardworking, Tears, Trust, Trust Issues, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Virginity, Vulnerability, Vulnerable Kim Taehyung | V, alternative universe, asshole jungkook, don't hate me please, explicit - Freeform, kind of, mean yoongi, minor blood, more tags will be added, rough, slow build up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-11-30 10:16:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11461518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyTaeBae/pseuds/MyTaeBae
Summary: Kim Taehyung is always far beyond stressed, and definitely far beyond malnourished, but none of that matters as long as he has his family.Until he doesn't.Until he's charged with the murder of twenty-six people, his family included.Jeon Jungkook has always been a strong believer that people are innocent until proven guilty.Until he meets Taehyung; Until he doesn't know what to think.How can you think when you've met someone so beautiful, yet so destructive all the same.





	1. Beginning

**_Monsters don't sleep under your_ **

**_bed._ **

**_They sleep inside your_ **

**_head._ **

 

* * *

It had been a long and miserable day for Taehyung.

Not only had he gotten fired from one of his many part-time jobs, but he had also ended up breaking down in front of his now ex-boss. Tae had begged for him to rethink the decision, words turning into loud sobs as he continued to speak. The cries must have attracted some attention, seeing as many of the shoppers had stopped what they were doing to watch the scene unfold.

His sobs had only helped foresee the answer his superior spoke, which happened to be a big no. But, hey, he thought it was worth a try. It was better than leaving and accepting defeat without a 'heartbreaking' fight.

Or, a fight at all, for that matter.

The teen's ex-boss quickly tried to calm him down as his cries intensified whilst he realized the gravity of the situation, and it worked, to an extent. The man had managed to coax him into heading into the back room and getting his things, but he hadn't managed to get Taehyung to stop sobbing as he made his way out of the main shopping area.

His tears had finally slowed as he packed the last bits of his things, pain numbing for the time being while he focused on the task at hand. The boy took off his name-tag, placing the piece of metal on his superior's desk before making his way to the front of the store and out of the big automatic glass doors.

Taehyung rubbed his cheeks with the ends of his hoodie sleaves, getting rid of whatever was left from his fit earlier. Apart from his red eyes, and black circles under them, you wouldn't even be able to tell that this boy had been crying less than twenty minutes prior.

Soon enough, though, the worries from earlier had returned. 'How am I going to tell eomma' he thought, struggling to walk straight along the sidewalk that led back home.

'How am I going to tell my hyungs' was his next thought, and that one worried him even more.

His brothers had put all this pressure on him to go to college and get a degree so he could support the family even more than he was currently. They had wanted Taehyung, along with his younger brother, to be successful, and so right after high school he had set out to go. He was sure that in the long road, getting his degree would help him a lot, but there was also the fact that he had to pay for student loans, and that was not a good thing to deal with for a family that was already in slight poverty.

To save money, though, he had agreed to stay with his mother and brothers in their small apartment on the other side of town, biking his way to campus when he needed to go to classes.

The teen had grown accustomed to the struggling lifestyle that came with the whole college experience, buying ramen for himself while he bought 'nicer' meals for the rest of his family. He would rather they be full than himself.

All of these worries had Taehyung wishing he could sit down and express all his concerns to his father. He wished that it was even possible for those things to happen, but they hadn't been for almost a decade.

When he was around ten, his father had died tragically in a plane crash right outside of Incheon. The accident had made international news based on how the plane had crashed, which was way out of the ordinary, at least for anywhere in Korea. The pilot had locked the cockpit doors, preventing other staff from making their way to him or the controls.

The pilot had decided to commit suicide this way, by crashing the plane and taking hundreds of innocent people with him.

He had managed, though, to put out one last message before everything went to hell.

"Lets die together."

After that, air traffic control officially lost contact with flight number 29 of Korea Air, departing from Incheon International Airport and heading to LAX.

Every single one of the three-hundred and fifteen passengers died on impact.

Taehyung knew all this for one reason and one reason only, which happened to be because they had talked about every little detail of the crash at school the next day. That was where he had found out about it, and that was where he had broken down and cried about it for six hours straight.

That day, thoughts of his father had kept appearing everywhere inside of his mind. He remembered the long vacations they used to take, and he remembered how happy they had been during every picture they took together. His family had been happy, and after his father's death, they wouldn't really ever be like that again. His mother had taken it the hardest, which was understandable, but the woman that now lived in their house was not that same person she was years ago. She was cold-hearted, and she yelled at least once every hour. She had grown to accept the whole ordeal, but that didn't stop the fact that they had nothing without his father.

There would be no more happy family photos, no more money to buy things for leisure, and no more long family vacations.

So, that was how Taehyung had ended up where he was. After the death, they had to give up their nice two-story house in Seoul, and move into a dinky apartment in a bad area of town, surviving on small servings of food, and whatever hope they had of living.

Which had, honestly, left him very unhealthily skinny and frail.

Working so many jobs, and so many hours, didn't help in the slightest, either. He woke up early every morning for classes, and as soon as they let out he rushed down to his job at a local convenience store. His shift there ended at eight, but that was not even near where his schedule stopped. After that,he would bike up to another local convenience store for his shift that started at eight forty. It then ended at four in the morning, allowing Taehyung a very limited amount of hours to get his work done for class. He only ever slept if he was literally about to pass out, and usually caught fifteen minute naps when he had breaks at work.

Even though his whole schedule was a lot more than messed up, he couldn't, and wouldn't, complain. His older brothers had dropped out to try and support their family, working even more hours so that Taehyung and his younger brother could attend school.

The boy snapped out of his thoughts, shaking his head as he focused on the sidewalk ahead of him, and the slightly scary realization that no one was on the sidewalk with him like normal. On a regular day, there were a whole bunch of people all around him, but there wasn't a single trace that anyone had been here in a few hours. 'Strange' he thought.

All Taehyung heard was heavy breathing, and soft, quiet footsteps.

Everything seemed normal until he heard a change in the pattern of footsteps. The steps had been in sync, but now they were uneven, and the teen had a very scary thought that he was not alone on this sidewalk. On a normal day this wouldn't have surprised him, but today something seemed off.

He turned at an upcoming corner, walking into a completely different block, only to hear the footsteps following.

Taehyung picked up his speed, walking a bit faster as to try and get away from whoever it was following him at this hour, only to hear the footsteps increase again. His stomach was dropping, and there were little beads of sweat forming along his forehead and neck. He was nervous, to sat the least, and he wouldn't dare turn around. He didn't know if he was ready to be faced with whoever it was following him, or come to the ever worse realization that there was no one there in the first place.

He continued walking for a few minutes, gradually hearing the footsteps decrease until they were nonexistent, and with that knowledge, Taehyung could finally breath easy, the sweet feeling of relief filling his tense body as he let out a well anticipated sigh.

He continued down the sidewalk silently, now feeling calm and secure again without the mystery person following him. Soon enough he turned another corner, walking down the dark alley that signified he was almost home. The alley smelled as rancid as ever, maybe even a bit worse than yesterday. The only thing it reminded him of was suffering. It made him think of dread, and loss of hope. Then again, if he were to get technical, it actually smelled like rotting food, sweat, and maybe a little bit of vomit.

Besides the smell, the alley itself wasn't all that bad. The walls were decorated by different bouts of graffiti, and out of the corner of his eye, Taehyung could swear there was already another one that had been added today. Overall, the alley was actually pretty peaceful, and the colors were a nice thing to see every day when you get home, as long as you did disregard all of the trash cans and garbage littered around their front door.

Really, if there wasn't all this trash here, the alley would be a great place to just admire the different kinds of art people have added over time. The graffiti itself seemed like it was about to come to life with how much energy it set off to anything in close range, but then all the garbage around it put the graffiti back in it's place, letting the dead atmosphere set it again.

This kind of surrounding sure didn't help Taehyung's thoughts as he prepared himself for the lecture he was sure to get from his mother, and mostly his older siblings. Of course, he knew they'd feel a bit down because their 'successful' brother had lost another job, and he knew they'd definitely be disappointed, but that was something he dealt with a lot. He hated letting people down, and it scared him to a certain extent, but he knew he'd survive, because he would be forgiven soon, and then he would just have to look for another job.

Finally, he reached the front door to his family's broken down apartment, ready for his scolding to begin since he was coming home early, only to notice that the door wasn't even shut. It was slightly ajar, and Taehyung knew that his brother always shut the door, which meant something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

It's like the dread from the alley had all detached itself from the surroundings and settled inside of Taehyung, weighing him down as his hand reached for the door handle, and pushing the feeling to the back of his mind only managed to make things worse by giving him a headache.

His heart was beating at an irregular speed as his hand finally reached the handle, and his breathing had turned heavy as bad thoughts flooded his brain. The adrenaline he'd grown to hate so much began to kick in, sweat once again on his forehead. With one push of the door, he could feel himself ready to vomit.

The world had seemed to have stopped as Taehyung took in the sight in front of him, eyes widening beyond the normal human extent. A look of pure horror had been burned into his features, while a strangled scream escaped from the back of his throat.

There, laying right in front of him on the floor, were the bodies of his mother and brothers.

He stumbled forward, immediately stepping back because the terrible smell of blood and death had finally hit him full force.

The boy looked down, noticing that there was now a clear footprint in the puddle of blood that seemed to have come from his youngest brother closest to the door, and as he looked closer, he could see that his normally white sneakers were now stained red on their soles.

His hands gripped at his hair, pulling at the strands with such force that it caused him to scream out again. His body was shaking as he made his way over to his mother, falling to his knees as he pulled her lifeless form into his arms, eyes starting to tear up again as he grasped what had happened, the shock having subsided.

As he shook his mother in his arms, he couldn't help but notice the blood all over his hands and clothes.

He was covered in blood.

He was covered in his mother's blood.

 


	2. Interrogation Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He doesn't want to remember.

 

* * *

 

_**If Death is staring you** _

_**in the face,** _

_**the first one to** _

_**blink,** _

_**loses.** _

* * *

 

  
"Jeon, I'm telling you, he's the one who did it!" The words sounded more like a growl as they were spoken, completely disregarding the 'inside voices' rule that the younger detective had put in place.

Min Yoongi, the man's counterpart, seemed to have finally snapped, not caring that Jungkook was indeed his superior, even if he was younger in the long run. He had more experiences when it came to these types of cases, and he knew that Yoongi was coming to conclusions way too fast.

"Look, Min, all I'm saying is that we don't have the sufficient amount of evidence needed to prove him guilty." The older detective's jaw dropped, shock written over every one of his round features. Soon enough, though, his expression turned to one of anger as he smashed his fist against the two-way mirror that separated the men from their suspect.

"What more do you fucking need, Jeon? The suspect was found covered in the victims' blood, and better yet, the victims were members of his own family, that sick bastard. The knife he used to stab them all was only a few feet away, well within reach from his mother, whom he was holding when the police arrived. Are you really just going to sit there and tell me he had nothing to do with this. If you are, you're more of a halfwit than I first thought." Jungkook sighed, setting his head in the palms of his hands as he rubbed his temple to try to calm himself down.

"If you have any hopes of moving up in this business, I suggest you stop cursing at me and treat me as your superior, are we clear?" Yoongi gulped, turning even paler than he already was as he realized all the words that had just spewed from his mouth without consent.

"I-yes, sir. I'm sorry, sir." Jungkook nodded, accepting the apology, before going ahead and looking past Yoongi, and onto the suspect trapped inside the other room. His left wrist was handcuffed to one of the legs of the table, keeping him in place. The boy's head was hung as he stared at the floor, having kept that same position ever since he had arrived. Light brown hair was covering the boy's facial features, and apart from that, Jungkook couldn't tell much about the suspect, other than the obvious fact that at least half of his entire body was covered in dried blood. 'Someone is definitely going to have to disinfect that chair' was the only thing he thought as he stared at the boy without him knowing.

"I say we just go talk to the guy, and then we can draw some things together about the case, okay?" Yoongi agreed instantly, not wanting to upset his superior like earlier.

The man was clearly not ready to meet the suspect, he was even maybe a little scared, having only heard the gist of what the police witnessed, but all that knowledge did was make Jungkook smirk. Yoongi had the nerve to call him out earlier, yet he was scared by a measly suspect.

He knew it was only the elder's second case, but if the suspect did try anything, there would always be that one handcuff holding him back.

Jungkook stood up, walking to the door as Yoongi stood behind him, obviously wanting him to enter first.

Now, the younger may have found this hilarious, and there was this small inkling in his brain telling him to make the other man go first, but he decided against it and just unlocked the door. He wasn't that big of an asshole.

The detectives entered the room, closing the door behind them, ensuring that it was locked tightly, before pulling out their chairs and sitting directly across from their suspect.

"Hello, sir, I'm Detective Min Yoongi, and this is my-"

"I'm his partner, Detective Jeon Jungkook" the man said, smiling at the boy across the table as he waited for any sort of recognition.

Yoongi glared at his counterpart, before turning his attention back to the person in front of him, only to become frustrated as he noticed that their defendant had yet to look up at them, seeming to be tuning them out.

"Sir."

"Mr. Kim," the elder tried again, only failing to catch his attention once more.

The detective called out the suspect's name again, and again, only to get no response whatsoever.

Jungkook, having had enough of this nonsense, clapped in front of the boy's face, snapping him back to reality as he jumped in his seat.

Both men were taken aback as their suspect looked up at them, taking in every aspect of his appearance.

Yoongi was honestly only surprised that the boy wasn't some weird adult in his mid thirties, maybe even a bit on the heavier and uglier side. If anything, he was the exact opposite.

The person across from them looked no younger than eighteen, although no older than twenty-one, so one could only guess an even nineteen and a half. He certainly looked too innocent to be suspected of murder.

Jungkook was different though, looking at the aspects past his age and general appearance. He took in every little detail with care, knowing that by the end of this case, whether he was found guilty or not, both boys would have to become strongly acquainted with each other.

He took in the teen's smooth, sun-kissed skin that ran along each of his facial features, however also noticing the splotches of blood and dirt located across his cheekbones and jawline. Gentle. yet terrified brown eyes stared back into his own as he examined the boy. He had rosy cheeks, and overall, he looked kind of like a child right now. The theory being proven further as the suspect's bottom lips began shaking slightly, a liquid known only as tears beginning to fill his eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time tonight.

The two detectives continued to eye their suspect from across the table, noticing the few tears that slipped out from beneath his now tightly shut eyes, acting as if it was too bright in the room.

Yoongi cleared his throat, trying to put his attention back onto the questions at hand as he glanced down at the file he had brought in with him.

"So, Mr. Kim, my reports tell me you are here under the suspicion of killing the Kim family, and other crimes connected to this case," the elder said in a rushed tone, making himself focus on his notes to avoid looking at the boy any longer.

There was a slight silence before a whispered phrase could be heard coming from their suspect.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Jungkook asked quietly, trying to be as gentle as possible with the boy in front of him, knowing he could probably break down at any second.

"Taehyung."

The two men only looked at the boy in confusion, eyebrows furrowed as they tried to make sense of what he had just said.

"What?"

"My name is T-Taehyung."

Another moment of silence slipped itself into the conversation, only creating more awkward tension than there was before.

All Yoongi could do was signal for Jungkook to continue and hope that he would notice, which he did, thankfully.

"Well, okay. Taehyung, could you please tell us what you remember from the crime scene?" Jungkook made sure to keep an even and soft tone as to not scare the boy into silence.

Taehyung, though, was panicking, not knowing how to handle this situation. He wasn't supposed to be here, none of this was supposed to happen. He was supposed to go home and get a lecture from his brothers, before getting a hug and being told it was okay. All he wanted to do was go home, but it would never be the same home again. No place was home without his family.

All these thoughts had more tears fanning themselves to the corners of his eyes, falling down his cheeks as a million emotions swirled throughout his head at once.

Then the thoughts of the bodies resurfaced. The thoughts of all the blood, and their dead, lifeless eyes that seemed to be glazed over.

Taehyung released a silent scream as he hid his face again, not needing another pity party on his behalf. He was struggling to keep any form of composure, though, wanting to rake his hands through his hair and pull on it till everything stopped hurting, only to notice that after all this time his left wrist was handcuffed to the table.

The two men just watched as the scene unfolded, not needing to get involved while the boy was in such a destructive state, although it seemed like he'd be this way for a while. And who could blame him?

Everything was falling apart.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author: MyTaeBae  
> Co-Author: -A-


	3. Hiraeth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiraeth
> 
> (n)a homesickness for a home you can't return to,or that never was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Chapter 3.
> 
> Time taken to finish: About 5 Days.
> 
> Co-Author: -A-
> 
> Author: MyTaeBae

* * *

 

"When I made it h-home I felt kind of u-uncomfortable. There w-was something off about the whole s-situation" Taehyung explained quietly, eager to be finished with the interrogation; eager to get away from the this place full of lies and untrustworthy kindness, so he could go home, if that place was even home anymore.

The two detectives nodded along, glancing at each other every other word the younger male spoke to confirm their thoughts between themselves.

Taehyung took a few deep breaths before going to continue, hoping to keep his composure as he spoke. It's not like they expected him to be completely calm anyways; It's not like he could just explain everything in fine detail and then smile and say he was okay, but they had finally gotten him to calm down after his fit earlier, and he really didn't want to make them hate him any more than they already did.

"The door was open slightly, which was immediately odd to me because my brother never leaves the door open. Then I went inside and saw them lying there, I-," He paused, proud of himself for making it this far without stuttering or tearing up, but continued all the same.

"I really don't remember much else..."

Jungkook looked up at him, watching as the boy's eyes flickered to different parts of the room every second that passed, finally landing back on his own gaze before looking down, watching his fingers below the table.

"Well, thank you for explaining everything, Taehyung, but please, if you could go a bit more in detail about when you got home, we'd really appreciate it." As that question was spoke, the younger felt something inside of him snap.

Multiple emotions attacked his brain at once; rage, sadness, confusion, everything hitting him with startling severity. He began trembling slightly, watching his hands begin to shake whenever he moved them, nervousness catching up with him as well, breath quickening as his heartbeat picked up.

How could he possibly explain what had happened in detail. The only thing stopping him from breaking down at this point was that nagging thought in the back of his mind that the two men in front of him would find him to be even more of a burden than Taehyung already felt on a normal day basis.

So, he sucked in all his emotions, somehow putting them to the back of his thoughts, giving himself a major headache in the process, but that was good enough for now. Closing his eyes tightly, he thought of the things that made him happy, instead, thinking of puppies, and flowers, all the cliche bullshit that somehow actually made this boy happy.

Jungkook was really trying not to show his worry in front of the "stranger" across the table; a boy that may have killed twenty-six people, although there wasn't any hard evidence linking him to the murders as of late.

He wasn't really sure about his colleague, though, as his features seemed to carry an unreadable expression that could only be described as blank.

Taehyung appeared to be the polar opposite. It was noticeable that he was breaking himself down bit by bit, even as he was trying to hide it so adamantly. He was still trembling, eyes filled with tears, although a slight smile was portrayed across those lips of his.

It seemed that the lightest touch could kill him, or the quietest noise could make him shatter into a thousand pieces like a broken mirror.

"I, uh, I think I remember smelling some sort of smoke...., cigarette smoke" the boy spoke softly, bringing the attention of the two detectives back to their case and out of the silence that had enveloped them.

"Does anybody in your family smoke? Your brothers, you, maybe?" Yoongi asked quietly, trying his best not to raise his voice and to be gentle with the boy in front of him.

Jungkook released a small scoff at his words though, not believing that his partner had actually tried to be nice when he couldn't even act that way around his superior.

But as Taehyung shook his head no, something clicked in his mind, realization of a certain fact setting in.

He opened the case file, scanning the paragraphs as he read about evidence from the other cases that had yet to be resolved, finally finding a sentence that caught his attention.

"Smells of cigarette smoke were reported to be found at each of the eleven crime scenes."

He could feel Yoongi lean closer, reading the line that Jungkook had pointed to with his finger. The elder's eyes widened, gazing up at his superior with yet again an unreadable expression.

"I don't t-think I can recall anything else" Taehyung said, his voice shaking as he spoke, his eyes wandering around the room again, trying to find something to focus on besides his bloody hands.

The two men nodded, accepting that there was no way for him to continue without losing his sanity piece by piece, or without freaking out like earlier.

"Can I, uh, ask a question, though?"

Yoongi nodded again, motioning for him to continue in a silent manner.

"What happens to me now?" His voice sounded so innocent, so confused and mislead, it almost had Jungkook pulled in at the sound. Although it may not be good to have a soft heart as a detective, all he wanted to do at this moment was protect Taehyung. All he wanted to do was pull the boy into a hug and tell him that everything was going to be alright.

"Detective Min, could I talk to you in private for a minute?" the younger asked, focusing his gaze on Yoongi as the other nodded, motioning to the door with a nod of his head.

"We'll be back in a bit and answer you then, okay?" Taehyung nodded, now noticing that neither of them had exactly thought that far.

As soon as he got the okay from their suspect, Jungkook stood, making his way to the door as Yoongi followed. He made sure to take observation of the way the younger boy was watching his every move from where he sat still at the interrogation table, listening to his footsteps echo around the room.

He then put the code into the lock pad, glad to hear the signature click that notified them of their rewarded exit. Feeling the cool metal under his fingertips, Jungkook pushed the door open, making room for the other detective to step out first.

Before he could leave, though, he eyed Taehyung, noting that the boy had already been looking at him as he made his way out. Hoping to make him feel a bit safer, he shot the younger a smile, not a big one with teeth and all, but not one of the thin lipped smiles either; a tiny grin found it's way along Jungkook's lips, showing a bit of his top row of teeth.

Taehyung did nothing, though, looking down as he did so.

He could only take that as a call to leave, which he did, closing the door behind him and making sure he heard the little click again.

Jungkook could hear Yoongi let out a breath that he had been holding as he shut the door, finally able to rid himself of the awkwardness of the room left behind.

"Did anyone from the station ever tell you where they were taking him?" he asked, pretending to scan through one of their files to get away with stealing glances at Taehyung again, watching him twiddle his thumbs under the table.

Yoongi let out a confirming grunt, pulling his jacket tighter around himself as he adjusted to the temperature change within the room.

"They said he'd probably go into protective custody, stay at the station to be kept monitored. They did say something about someone stepping up to keep watch, but it seems like no one is brain-dead enough to do that yet." The elder let out a snort at his own words, as if to help imply the idiocy of what he mentioned.

"I assume that's all you wanted to know, so let's go wrap this up for right now." Yoongi then walked up to the door, pushing it open a crack before being interrupted.

"I'll do it."

His colleague turned towards him with a bewildered expression, almost one of disgust.

"What?" Jungkook could see that the door was open by the sliver of dim light that was shining through, so he knew Taehyung could hear him, but he wanted him to hear. He wanted him to know that this was what had been decided.

"You heard what I said. Tell them I'll do it. Tell them I'll take care of Taehyung until he's cleared."

With that, Jungkook stepped past Yoongi into the interrogation room, looking at the younger boy once again only to find his eyes wide, his mouth hung open slightly. Almost as if he was asking "Are you serious?", but he was indeed one-hundred percent serious, and to prove it, he sent the boy another smile, going for the same half grin as last time.

Yeah, Jungkook knew the risks of this; he knew that there was a chance that if Taehyung really was the killer, he could easily murder him in his sleep if he wanted to, but for some reason he trusted him.

The small smile the he received back from the boy only made that trust grow more.

At that moment, Jungkook knew he was a goner. That smile had sold the idea inside of his head.

But he had nothing to lose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Message From -A-: Hello there, I'm the co-writer who has lost her life to BTS and doesn't know how to cope with it:)
> 
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> 
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	4. Kalopsia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kalopsia
> 
> (n. ) The delusion of things being more beautiful than they really are.
> 
> You say I'm beautiful,but what I see in the mirror isn't.
> 
> Oh,did I imagine that you said that? 
> 
> I'm sorry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well,from now on I'm gonna be writing chapters on my own! So it'll take double the time,I'm sorry if you guys had to wait for this but I hope you like it!
> 
> Comment and leave kudos if you want!

 

 

* * *

 

* * *

If you had told Jungkook three years ago that one day he'd be driving home with a murder suspect asleep in the backseat of his car, he would've laughed in your face and called you crazy right then and there.

But here he was, looking into his rear-view mirror every other minute to check on the sleeping figure curled into a ball behind him.

The boy honestly looked so peaceful in this state; he definitely looked a lot happier, more content, even. And that realization alone was enough to make Jungkook regret having to wake him up later. He didn't want to have to force Taehyung back into his cruel reality.

Waiting for the stoplight to change from red to green seemed to take longer than usual today, especially since he took this way home all the time and it had never once lasted this long. It felt longer, at least. Jungkook just sighed and laid his head back against the headrest, trying to clear his mind of all the useless thoughts that had invaded it over the course of his day.

After a few more seconds, he could see the light turn green in the corner of his eye. Mumbling a quiet "finally," he turned left onto another street, leaving the course of the drawn out highway and heading into the more secluded area of town.

Jungkook preferred living somewhere more private; somewhere he couldn't hear the night traffic and loud noises that came from within the city. The silence that came with living alone was one of the most comfortable silences he had ever had the pleasure of experiencing. Although the silence was about to be disturbed, he wouldn't complain. Taehyung needed someone to take care of him, so that's what he was going to do.

As he drove along the now quiet road ahead of him, Jungkook's mind couldn't help but drift back to the murders. Taehyung was currently their only suspect, mainly because before when the murders had been discovered it was by policemen themselves, not some random pedestrian. but he honestly didn't think that this boy had anything to do with it. That would be a bit harder to compel the police to believe though. This whole case was unusual; the killer hadn't done anything for months and then suddenly he strikes again and this time there's someone to blame. That's when things could get difficult.

Before the most recent killing, people didn't even know what to call this case. No one really knew what to do; but now that Taehyung had been reported, the news had spread like wildfire. It had only happened hours ago, yet the murder had already gotten international attention.

It was all for the wrong reason, though. The only reason the news had spread so widely was because the person who had so-called committed the crime was "hot"; It was an absolutely ridiculous reason. Why should people tune in so suddenly just because the boy was above average in his appearance?

Jungkook could agree, though, that he thought the person asleep behind him was absolutely breathtaking. He had to be careful with that realization though. Even if he believed Taehyung was innocent, he couldn't be sure unless he gave it time. There just wasn't any evidence to prove that either side were true yet, and he sure as hell wasn't going to let them put him in prison for a crime he didn't commit, especially at the state he was in.

Looking at him now, all he wanted to do was protect him. He was like a wounded animal, and Jungkook just needed to nurse him back to health and take care of him.

He had to shake his head, though, to get that thought out of his head. He couldn't let himself think that way. He couldn't have any kind of tie to a suspect like that, it was dangerous and quite frankly, a stupid idea in general. He had just met the boy a few hours ago, all he knew was his name, the crime he was convicted of, and the fact that he was emotionally unstable at this time.

After a half hour of driving, Jungkook finally pulled into his driveway, relieved to be home after this whole day of crazy. Staring up at the bluish-gray painted walls of his house, he finally let himself relax, knowing that he would be able to fall into a deep sleep soon enough. His house was a bit small compared to how much he made, but it was great for one person. It was small, but comfortable, and that's all he really needed in a home. The inside itself was pretty messy, though. It's not like he had anyone to impress, but he could admit the fact that he did need to try a little harder when cleaning.

Jungkook lent his head against the steering wheel for a few minutes, just breathing deeply and trying to think of all the things he need to do before he could go to bed himself.

The first that came to mind was the thing he had been dreading the whole car ride; waking up Taehyung.

He knew he had to do it, though, so slowly but surely he unbuckled his seat belt and stepped out onto the cool concrete of his driveway, breeze hitting him almost instantly.

He walked around to the other side of the car to get to the door Taehyung was located next to, pulling it open as he finally got to see the sleeping boy up close. The dried blood that was littered across nearly half of his body looked more like dirt smudges now; the smell was still horrendous, though, as he leaned closer to the boy to try and nudge him awake. As he leaned in, he could clearly see a line that used to be occupied by tears that had been carved into the blood splotches, and it kind of broke his heart. This boy had been through so much in one day. He just need a nice bath and a good night's rest.

Taehyung then started snoring quietly, snapping Jungkook out of his thoughts. The snores were small and cute, coming out muffled because of the sleeve that the younger had covering his mouth as he slept. He couldn't help but laugh to himself as he watched to boy for a few more seconds, before tapping his shoulder in an attempt to wake him up. He waited for a few seconds, getting no response other than another snore, which made him smile again. He was in such a deep sleep, it was like he hadn't slept in weeks, and with the bags under his eyes, he probably actually hadn't. The boy kind of reminded him of sleeping beauty though.

He sighed at his own thoughts, but decided to make it his secret nickname, nonetheless.

He shook Taehyung this time, actually giving in some effort into trying to wake the younger up. After the second attempt, a tiny noise could be heard coming from him, something along the lines of a little grunt, and Jungkook swore his heart skipped a beat when the boy's beautiful brown eyes opened slowly, staring up at the older from where he laid against the back seat. Tiny tears formed in the corners of his eyes as he yawned, stretching out slightly when he sat up.

He was still drowsy, so it kind of surprised him when he realized that he was in the detectives car in front of a house he had never seen before; but for some reason, as the man smiled at him from outside the door, he could feel himself relaxing a bit.

"Are you okay?" Jungkook asked, voice laced with a hint of worry as he noticed the little sliver of fear in his eyes.

Taehyung just nodded, not really knowing what to think about this whole situation. Standing right in front of him was the person that had interrogated him for hours; the man who had this stern air about him and seemed to have authority over the whole room, was now smiling as him dopily in front of what appeared to be his house, painted a dark blue from what he could see in his seat.

He leaned in a bit closer to inspect the elders face, seeing how much calmer he looked outside of the work environment, and in all honesty, seeing how attractive he was now that his eyebrows weren't furrowed and he wasn't lost in thought.

The smile etched across his face had Taehyung blushing heavily, increasing his heart rate, and resulting in him having to hide his face in his hands.

He couldn't explain why the man in front of him made him feel that way, though, he didn't really want to.

"Well, we should probably get inside before we freeze. Come on," Jungkook said, holding his hands out for the boy to hold onto to make sure he stood up steadily, and didn't hurt himself getting out.

Even though the moment was brief, and the elder had let go the second he had exited the car successfully, Taehyung could still feel the softness of his hands against his. For someone who seemed so tough, his hands were surprisingly smooth.

As he looked up at the house, he could finally see just how big it actually was. After living in that broken-down apartment for so many years, this seemed like a mansion. Even if it was definitely smaller than whatever he had expected this guy to have, it had a homey feel to it, and that was something that made Taehyung feel at ease.

Walking up onto the steps connected to the front deck, he watched as the elder fumbled with his keys, finding the right key and then unlocking the door. He stepped back, motioning for Taehyung to enter first as he shoved his keys back into his jacket pocket.

The warm air he was greeted with as he entered the house felt odd against his blood-covered skin, but he ignored the feeling, bending down to take his shoes off instead. He tried not to flinch as he noticed the faded red color that was still clearly visible on the soles of his shoes, focusing on his laces as he undid the double-knot he had tied them in earlier that morning.

He placed both shoes against the doorstep, right next to Jungkook's dress shoes that he had taken off only seconds earlier, along with his jacket that he had hung over a coat hook.

 just nodded, not caring what he did with it as long as it was off his body. He took off the jacket, handing it over and watching as Jungkook left to put it somewhere, probably the laundry room.

When the elder returned, he had a glass of water in his hand which he passed on to Taehyung, watching him with hopeful eyes.

"Before you do anything, please drink some water. You need to be hydrated," he said with a small smile, waiting patiently for the frail boy in front of him to finish the glass.

 

As he looked up at the house, he could finally see just how big it actually was. After living in that broken-down apartment for so many years, this seemed like a mansion. Even if it was definitely smaller than whatever he had expected this guy to have, it had a homey feel to it, and that was something that made Taehyung feel at ease. Walking up onto the steps connected to the front deck, he watched as the elder fumbled with his keys, finding the right one and then unlocking the door. He stepped back, motioning for Taehyung to enter first as he shoved his keys back into his jacket pocket. The warm air he was greeted with as he entered the house felt odd against his blood-covered skin, but he ignored the feeling, bending down to take his shoes off instead. He tried not to flinch as he noticed the faded red color that was still clearly visible on the soles of his shoes, focusing on his laces as he undid the double-knot he had tied them in earlier that morning. The younger placed both shoes against the doorstep, right next to Jungkook's dress shoes that he had taken off only seconds earlier, along with his jacket that he had hung over a coat hook.

"Here, let me take your hoodie. I'll try to clean it the best I can, or if you'd rather, you can have one of mine." Taehyung just nodded, not caring what he did with it as long as it was off his body. He took off the jacket, handing it over and watching as Jungkook left to put it somewhere, probably the laundry room. When the elder returned, he had a glass of water in his hand which he passed on to Taehyung, watching him with hopeful eyes. "Before you do anything, please drink some water. You need to be hydrated," he said with a small smile, waiting patiently for the frail boy in front of him to finish the glass. He looked rather skinny without the hoodie to hide in; the white t-shirt clung to his small frame, and Jungkook could finally see how tiny his waist was. "I don't have any of your clothes, but you can borrow some of mine. I'm sure I've got some old stuff that'll fit you okay." He took the finished glass from Taehyung's hand, setting it down on a small end table next to one of the two-seater couches in the middle of his living room. "You should also probably shower...I don't mean to be rude but you smell awful." Jungkook laughed nervously, hoping he hadn't offended the younger, but as he watched a grin grow across his face, he knew that he was overthinking things. It's not like he had ever taken care of someone else before. He had been living alone for about six years, all he was used to was taking care of his own needs. He had no idea what Taehyung needed compared to himself. All of the necessities were obvious of course, but anything to do with emotions was far beyond his comprehension.

"I...I want to thank you." The words were quiet as they were spoken, but Taehyung meant them with all his heart. There was no telling what would have happened to him without Jungkook to take him in. Instead of being held in prison for the next few months, he was promised shelter inside of the elder's home, and he was truly thankful for that. "Really, for everything. You're letting me stay in your house, letting be borrow your clothes...I don't think I'll ever be able to repay you." His words make Jungkook smile. It wasn't a big smile, but it was enough for Taehyung to know that he appreciated what he'd said nonetheless.

There was a turmoil going on in Jungkook's head, though. He wanted to trust the boy so bad. He wanted to protect him, and spoil him rotten, but he just couldn't. There was that looming suspicion stuck in the back of his mind, along with the events that had happened only hours earlier. He wanted to be able to say that Taehyung wasn't at fault for the whole situation, but there just wasn't proof. So, until then, he couldn't let himself get too close. "It's no problem, seriously. I couldn't even imagine you stuck in that god awful place, especially with how fragile you are right now." His eyes widened as he realized what he had said. Jungkook was the type of guy that spoke his mind, regardless of the situation, and that could get him into some pretty bad arguments. It was one of his lesser qualities.

"I'm sorry, I, uh, probably shouldn't have said that. Just...follow me." He started walking towards his bathroom, hearing the boy's gentle footsteps from behind him. Walking inside of the small tiled room, he turned on the light, then opened up the wooden cabinet in front of the sink, grabbing his grey towel from inside; it was the softest. He set in on top of sink counter, glancing up at the younger as he picked up a few more things and set them up accordingly. Taehyung was watching because he knew he was tense. His shoulders were hunched, and he had a stricken look on his face, almost as intense as he was at work. It's not that Taehyung was a crybaby; he could be tough when he needed too, and he could definitely take a minor insult, if you could even consider being fragile an insult, especially when only hours earlier he had been sobbing. Taehyung didn't even notice when Jungkook started the bath water, only realizing it when he felt a tap on his shoulder, seeing Jungkook standing only a few feet away with a worried expression written on his face. "Are you okay?" The obvious answer was no. He was so not okay that it physically pained him, but he just nodded anyways, wanting to get into the bath before the water got cold. "Well, I'll give you some clothes when you get out, alright? Just call me when you're done." Taehyung nodded again, staring at the floor as his thoughts threatened to take over. Jungkook stepped out of the bathroom, walking back in the direction of the living room, leaving the younger to himself in the comfort of his destructive state of mind.

He made sure to look away from the mirror, not exactly wanting to see how dirty and grimy he looked at the moment. In the meantime, he started to undress, getting ready for the warm water that was soon to envelope him. His clothes piled up in the center of the floor, but he really didn't care, he just walked over them and stepped into the bath water that happened to be filled with bubbles. It made him happy to know that Jungkook had thought about that kind of thing, regardless of how tiny the act was. Taehyung rested his head against the edge of the bath for a second before picking up a rag and squeezing out a bit of soap onto it from one of the many bottles that were littered around the bath's edge. He scrubbed his skin roughly, trying his hardest to get all of the blood off of it, leaving the water all around him to turn reddish and murky. The sight of it had his stomach turning, and the rag was pressing harder against his skin as he washed his face, tears forming in his eyes at the harshness of the friction. He still felt dirty, even after getting all of the dried blood off of his tan skin. The hot, worthless tears that had built up began to fall from Taehyung's eyes, his legs curling up as he rocked silently. He tugged his greasy hair, and the water sloshed around him, some even outside of the tub. Taehyung knew he was making a mess, but his mind wanted him to block that fact out; his mind wanted him to scream and pull at his hair until it came out. His mind was dangerous.

Jungkook had heard the water sloshing for a while now, but he had let it be, thinking that the boy must have been playing in the bubbles or had maybe just spilled some on accident, but soon the cries and sobs filled his ears, and he knew something was wrong. His legs carried him to the bathroom in a matter of seconds, and he didn't hesitate to open the door as he reached it. The boy in front of him looked severely wrecked. Taehyung's eyes were bloodshot and tears kept making their way of out of them whilst he tugged on his hair harshly.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, stop it."

The younger boy stared up at him, tears still streaming down his puffy cheeks. "You shouldn't hurt yourself like that, please, calm down." His hands gradually made their way out between his greasy, brown locks, placing themselves around his knees instead. Jungkook bent down next to tub, remembering to roll his sleeves up first, before leaning on the edge of it. "I'm sorry for bursting in here, but I couldn't just let you do that to yourself. You don't deserve that, no matter what happened tonight."

* * *

 

So maybe he was kind of in over his head. He'd often fail to take care of even just himself properly so the thought of taking care of another individual was pretty frightening now that he thought about it more,but he'd already signed the papers and if he didn't take care of the younger who would?

Last night was strange to say the least,he was still absolutely perplexed for some reason. The other had asked him to stay,at least until he was asleep,so Jungkook literally just laid there,staring at the other while being hugged to death. But the thing that scared him was that he wasn't bothered by it. If anything it kind of pained him when he left,leaving the smaller boy alone in the dark master bedroom that was dimly lit by a small nightlight.

With nowhere else to sleep,he occupied his very comfy and messy couch,staring into it's grey material all night as he struggled to fall asleep. It wasn't because it was uncomfortable,since he had already said it was comfy,it was more because of the thoughts and dreams that plagued his mind that made him switch positions and made him find ways to not sleep all night. Instead opting to stand up and get water or check an email on his phone every ten to thirty minutes.

He had some very peculiar and puzzling dreams last night,starting with one that left him awake with a sense of adrenaline. For some reason he dreamt that someone had broken in,leaving the blue house in ruins and a frail lifeless body to which belonged to the only other male currently inhabiting this place. When he awoke from the dream,he instantly scanned his surroundings,even though he was fully aware that it was only a stupid nightmare. The next one was just all out bizarre.

He was in some sort of cell before there was a loud explosion,something happened next that he couldn't remember but he knew that there was a lot of confetti and cake everywhere in the end. Some other short dreams occurred last night,but he honestly couldn't remember and frankly he couldn't care less.

Wait,doesn't 'couldn't care less' mean that he cared? So wouldn't it technically be,'he could care less'.? He grimaced,fully aware that his thoughts were starting to wander.

He was currently making breakfast,since it was only about nine in the morning and the other wasn't even awake yet,he decided that it was important that both of them should be well fed. He was making a rather 'American' breakfast,French toast with a side of eggs and a small fruit salad.

Aside from the fact that he was beyond amazing at his job as a police detective,he also had a talent for cooking. Since he had cooked for himself in college and high school most of the time since his parents weren't around in the morning and evening to make him lunch and breakfast,they were mostly only home at night anyways. It was a necessary skill he needed to learn when he moved out of his house to go to college and the police academy,he didn't want to make packaged or cup ramen every day.

He was glad that he wasn't that broke college student,receiving about two thousand every month from his parents. Enough to pay for his medium size apartment,food and enough to go out sometimes to have some fun.

After college he had a break year,mostly moving back to his parents house and just hanging out,waiting for his 21st birthday to arrive so he was of legal age to join the police academy.

He jumped a little,feeling some hot oil hit his skin as he started to put the eggs on the two plates. He was mostly done now,only needing to cut the fruit and add cool whip,he placed the eggs next to the French toasts,moving the two plates to his cold wooden table,hearing a small sound as he placed them down to roughly.

He sipped his warm coffee,melting into the warmth as he tasted the bitter and slightly sweet liquid,smiling at the rush of energy he sudden felt from it,Placing his favorite black mug that had the words 'Get Shit Done' on it on the marble counter that was in arms reach from where he was cutting the fruit,slightly irritated from the fact that he'd almost cut himself multiple times now.

When he was done making the food,he heard a door open,a sound like a small whine could be heard as he turned around and his eyes widened at what he saw. There,down the hall,was a sleepy Taehyung who was holding a pillow to his chest,yawning with each step he took.

Jungkook just stood there,still as a rock with his hands clutching one of the dining room chairs,he seriously felt his heart skip a beat for about the eighth time since Taehyung has been here. He stared as Taehyung came closer,the light from the windows highlighting his skin as the younger boy shyly smiled at him.

When Taehyung woke up,he had been completely confused and scared,he momentarily forgotten about where he was and what he was doing there. Of course all of the events came back to him in a matter of seconds but he just payed there for a while,waiting for his beating heart to calm down,he yawned and sighed at the warm and soft pillows and blankets surrounding him as he saw small rays of light peek out from the covered windows.

So here he now was,walking over to where Jungkook was while using his oversized shirt sleeve to wipe his eyes,the white shirt felt more like a dress to be honest,covering the small shorts that Jungkook had given him anyways. He had for some reason carried a pillow with him,clutching it to his chest with one hand while the other was rubbing his face.

He looked slightly up,using his free hand to brush some of his hair to the side so he could see better. He blushed when he saw that Jungkook was standing in front of him,staring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll post another chapter,probably soon!


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